Subconsciously, we allow the pain and hurt from "old" relationships to permeate new ones. We don't do it on purpose, but just like if someone tries to hit you; naturally your body will flinch and protect itself against the attack. That is the same way we respond to hurt. Once we have been hurt we develop a natural tendency to "flinch" the next time someone tries to hurt us.
Our minds remember the symptoms that resulted in the hurt. And so, if our new relationship shows symptoms of hurt, we "flinch". Sometimes our "flinching" is warranted and other times its not. For example, if the one who hurt you was texting someone he shouldn't be and you found it; does that mean you should look through your next relationship's phone? No, it doesn't, but often times we make the next person pay for what the last one did.
At some point, you are going to have to let that go and recognize they are not them and as long as you continue to treat them like they are you will never grow (alone or together). I want you to grow and experience the bliss in your relationship. Remember not to make the new one pay for the old one's mistakes.
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